No more expander!

My surgery is over!  The recovery has been nowhere near as hard as after my mastectomy, but still harder than I was expecting.

First off, I have to say it's true - the relief of not having an expander was felt immediately.  I had gotten so used to having it there that I forgot how uncomfortable and annoying it really was, but I can't really feel the permanent implant at all.  Even with the discomfort in my left side, it is so nice not having that rock-hard feeling anymore.

I've noticed a pattern with my surgeries.  Each time I go into the OR, I remember more and more.  The first time, I barely even remember getting wheeled into the room.  I vaguely remembered trying to slide myself over onto the operating table but even that was fuzzy and I thought it was a dream.  The second surgery, I remember the trip to the OR, I remember scooting myself onto the table, I remember seeing my surgeon, and I remember coughing as they put the mask on me.  The last time, I remember all that, plus I remember them telling me things to think about.  I remember them saying, "think about being at the beach.. or better yet, think about finishing nursing school."  I remember the really pleasant feeling as I drifted off to sleep.  That was nice.

When I woke up, I forgot all that for a moment and thought I was about to start my surgery.  Then I realized that it was already over.  By the time I got my glasses and realized what time it was, it was 11:00, and my surgery started at 8:00.  I think the surgery lasted somewhere between 2 and 2 and a half hours.  I was in recovery for a short while, then I got to go home.

This time when I woke up, I did not have to deal with the nausea like last time.  They were true to their word and gave me a scopolamine patch for behind my ear and a pill, and that with my IV concoction seemed to do the job of preventing nausea.  They told me to take the patch off the next day if I didn't feel nauseous, or to leave it on for up to three days.  I left it on for 2, then I took it off before I took my first shower because I hadn't felt nauseous.  A few hours after taking it off, the nausea was back.  I have been taking Zofran for that but it isn't working as well as that patch did, so I asked my doctor if I could get a prescription for that instead.  I'm hoping he says yes, because nausea realllllly sucks.

What's weird is, this time around, my skin seemed to get super sensitive to everything.  I got a lovely rash on my hand from the tape over my IV, so I guess I'm allergic to that or something.  Also my skin was just really itchy and easily irritated at first.  Another thing was that my mouth was really dry and my throat was really sore for the first couple days.  I don't remember if that happened with my other surgeries, but if it did, it wasn't as bad as this time.  A good thing this time around is the pain is less severe, and when I'm laying down it's usually not noticeable.  Also the range of motion in both my arms seems to be perfect, I can put on a t-shirt with no problem, yay!

I have two drains this time, just like last time.  The difference is, I have a drain on each side this time, which makes it impossible to sleep on my side even a little bit.  Strictly back sleeping until I get these out, which will hopefully be soon.  They're just a pain in the butt to always have there, and like I said, my skin is super sensitive for some reason, so they kinda hurt.  And I have to wear a cami to hook them onto because having the bulb thing touch my skin is an irritant.  Last time I just hooked them to my bra and it was no problem.  They were still annoying, but they're a little worse this time.

Oh, so here's a funny story.  On Friday afternoon, my plastic surgeon called to see how I was doing.  (My breast surgeon and the recovery nurse also called to check on me, that was sweet.  It was especially nice to hear from my breast surgeon, I miss her.)  Anyway, so I asked him about getting my drains waterproofed, because I really didn't want to wait until Monday to take a shower.  He said I could come in that day.  I felt fine, so my mom and I hopped in the car to go to kaiser.  (Well, more like she helped me get in and buckled me.  There was no hopping on my end.)

We were barely halfway down Laguna Blvd (not far from my house at all) when I started getting really tired. The idea of driving all the way to Kaiser, walking all the way to my doctor's office, sitting in the waiting room for who knows how long (since I was a drop-in), sitting in the office, walking back, etc etc, seemed impossible.  I told my mom maybe we should turn around and just do it on Monday.  We almost did, but then she reminded me that Monday was a holiday so it wouldn't be until Tuesday.  So I sucked it up and we powered through to Kaiser.  (I just realized I went a little parentheses-crazy here, lol.)

We pulled up in front and we were really lucky because someone was just leaving one of those wheel chair things and getting into his car.  So I sat in it and my mom tried to figure out how to wheel it off to the side so I could sit while she parked the car.  Another lucky thing was that there was a volunteer escort right there who told us how to use it and wheeled me over to my building.  He even waited with me while my mom parked.  I of course felt like such a dork, wearing sweats and slippers with my drains bulging out through my sweatshirt, but oh well.  I was thankful for that wheel chair, because I'm pretty sure I wouldn't have been able to walk all the way to the office and back.  And I was glad that we did that, because taking a shower makes everything so much better.

Being couch-ridden is as boring as ever.  Earlier today I finally started playing that Candy Crush Saga game, and I'm addicted to it.  We'll see how long that lasts before I get bored and move on to something else.  When I get enough energy I want to start working through my GRE test prep book which will give me something else to do.  Otherwise, watching TV, doing crossword puzzles, and sleeping are the main activities.

Okay, in case you want to know, I'm gonna play Candy Crush Saga til 11, take my keflex and maybe a pain pill, turn on Friends, and go to sleep.  Nighty night :)

Squishy thoughts

Here I am, finally about at the end of my journey.  Well, depending on if I do nipple reconstruction, maybe one more minor procedure after this.  But tomorrow is the last time I'll be going under anesthesia, hopefully for a long time.  I cannot wait for it to all be over!

I'm not excited about getting up at 5:30, going under, having drains, and recovering, but once that is all over I am so excited to be rid of this expander and be in the squishy world.  I don't know what it's going to feel like to not have a softball in my chest anymore, but I've heard it just feels so much different (in a good way).  Everyone on the breast cancer forum has said that they can just feel the difference right after surgery, and it's so much better, even with the pain.  So yay.

The semester is over, and my classes went well; now I have a couple weeks until summer school starts.  School is never-ending for me, but I love it.  Hopefully I can finish my pre-reqs by July and start applying to nursing school.  So exciting!  I also have a trip to the castle of love in Napa for wine tasting in my near future, so another thing to look forward to.

Okie doke, I'm going to finish cleaning my room, take a shower, and plan out my outfit for tomorrow.  I'm thinking the black button-up that Mom-mom got me and my bright blue sweats.  Haha, so when the lady was talking to me on the phone about what to bring to surgery and stuff, she told me to wear a loose button-up shirt.  "You can borrow one from your dad, or husband, or brother... just find someone with a loose button up shirt to borrow."  I thought it was weird, especially since I already have plenty of loose button up shirts of my own, but also how she was giving me all these people I could ask.  And now apparently I'm supposed to have a husband.  Chuckle chuckle.

Okay nighty night everyone. <3 p="">

Life is good

Busy, but good.  I was planning on doing my case study tonight since it's due on Monday, but I got distracted looking up stuff about breast implants and then I decided to write a blog instead.

So, school has been crazy.  Almost done with the semester, but this next week is going to be hectic with finals and assignments.  Once that's all over I'll be so relieved.  Then I'll have a few days to relax until my exchange surgery!  I am so excited!

I had my pre-op today, and it went really well.  I was getting a little nervous beforehand, like I didn't know exactly what I wanted and I had a zillion questions to ask.  But I asked them and I got all my answers and I'm feeling a lot better.  My PS and I are on the same page about size and projection and stuff, and I'm feeling comfortable and confident that it's going to end up looking good.

He said the surgery would probably last 2 1/2 to 3 hours, so around as long as my mastectomy (a little shorter I think, I'm not sure how long it was but I believe it was longer than 3 hours.)  But anyway... OH!  So I asked about the possibility of putting anti-nausea medicine in my IV this time, since I really suffered from the nausea last time, and he was saying they would do the same things as last time but that they would also put a "cocktail" of medications including anti nausea in my IV.  I was confused, because they hadn't done anything last time.  He said they were supposed to have given me an anti nausea pill and a patch thing for behind my ear, and they didn't do either. That would have probably made my life a heck of a lot easier after my mastectomy, because it really was not fun waking up in such an uncomfortable state.  I really hope it works and that this surgery goes smoothly.

It will probably be an outpatient procedure, but there is a chance that I'll have to stay overnight again.  I hope I don't, but if I do, my mom said she would stay with me :)

The bummer is, I'll have to have drains again.  This time on both sides since I'm getting the implant on the other side too.  I didn't think I was going to have to since they're not removing any tissue this time, but he said people drain a surprisingly high amount after this surgery, and I guess it's better to let it drain.  Sigh.  He said I'll have them both out within a week of the surgery, and if I don't it's because I'm doing too much.  So I'll be sure to sit on the couch and not do anything as much as possible to get those drains out ASAP.

In other news, I'm finally getting the hood of my car fixed.  (For those who don't know, it has been a lovely orange color for the past year or so, and the rest of my car is black.)  My super awesome pal Nick helped me sand it, prime it, and paint it today.  And by helped I mean he did all the work while I watched.  Well, I helped with the air hose sprayer thing.  And uh, moving the hood around.  And provided moral support, lol.  I left my hood there to dry overnight and then in the morning it shall be painted with a clear coat and then I'll have a nice pretty hood again!  For now my car looks even more ghetto with no hood haha.

In other other news, my brother Chris and sister in law Zahra are walking in the Susan G. Komen race for the cure tomorrow in honor of me :)  I feel so special.

In even more other news, my boo Nicole is finally in town!  I missed her so much, I think she should just stay here ;) It sucks that she's only here for a week, but any time I get to spend with her is a good time.

Okay, I need to go to bed.  I'm such a grandma.  Goodnight lovelies.  :)